I went from fit, active and healthy to nothing, overnight.

When I graduated college I changed my life. I started running and within one year had completed my first marathon. I lost about 40 pounds and the praise felt so good. A little too good. I thought I was doing the right thing—eating well, exercising and teaching the world how they too could be healthy.

I took numerous trainings, completed my BS in Wellness and my MS in Mental Health Counseling. I journaled, slept well, had supportive relationships, felt vibrant—things were going well you could say.

But in 2015 all that changed.

I woke up one morning, collapsed to the floor and ended up in the ER never to be the same again.

I spent months and months (and that turned into years) hunting down medical answers. I took an unpaid leave of absence from work for months and could barely move from my bed.

They called it, “Chronic Fatigue.”

Over the course of my years of digging I was offered several medications and had a lot of cold medical interactions. Something was missing. I was digging and digging but no one could help me. It wasn’t like I had some terrible diagnosis—it was worse, I felt horrible, barely able to function and had nothing to call it. No one was showing up on my door with meals or telling me to “stay strong”…it was like the world kept moving and I was stuck in a horrible bubble of suffering.

I went from fit, active and healthy to nothing, overnight.

It wasn’t long before I felt deeply depressed. I was having panic attacks that landed me in the ER. The depression felt so deep I contemplated taking my life on more than one occasions.

Why am I sharing all this with you?

I’m sharing this backstory with you because today, I can actually feel my value and worth without having to overproduce. I can sense myself beyond my abilities to perform.

If I cannot do something it’s not because I’m not good enough, it’s because I’m still growing.

I have an inner ally.

I’ve been healing chronic fatigue, panic attacks and depression one breath at a time and it’s transformed who I am.

This is an invitation to a life of more ease and joy. Here, we discard the “push harder” strategy that so many are blindly operating from.
We cannot create an aligned life by operating from fear and urgency. It will break our integrity in half!