No More Self-Care. Please!

Hey Momma, are you a little tired of all the advice that will help you, “be better” at something? Why does the world think we suck at so many things? :)

How to: Sleep more, eat better, exercise more, have better boundaries! Eat more organic, eat clean, meditate!

And don’t forget to snuggle with your kids regularly or you’ll cause childhood trauma!

I am so damn tired of hearing the world tell me to fit more in! OR show me where I’m not enough (again).

Quite honestly, YOU AND I deserve better than this!

What you and I deserve transcends self-care. What we need is beyond finding the right app, or organizing ourselves better. We need a dang revolution!

Here’s what I want to say to you: Your perceived failure, has nothing to do with you. It’s not your fault.

Read that again: It’s not your fault!

Our culture is so individualistic that we’ve never had another choice but to feel like it’s our fault. Our system is so self-centered and focused on personal gain, that we’ve created a monster within that roars, “if you can’t keep up or balance life then you’re doing something wrong.”

A culture that dismisses it’s collective responsibility is a breeding ground for broke-down and burnt out women!

Are you feeling this yet?

Four years ago, I burnt out, crashed and had to take a leave of absence from work. My employer gave me one month to figure out a long-term plan! I had no medical answers, no income coming in… there was no fucking plan! There was only PANIC and two very small children I needed to be my best for.

That one month came and went and I told my employer I would come back to work for 20 hours per week. They agreed and I began the process of stumbling back into work. I coached clients while I was barely able to walk. No one knew it because I disguised it. I disguised it because a deeply afraid part of me said, “if you can’t work, it’s your fault.” And I didn’t want it to be my fault. I didn’t want to admit I was weak, broken, or incapable. (I never knew this wasn’t my fault. I could only feel blame.)

I wanted to be able to do it all, like the world told me I was capable of, if I just…..

If I just what?

DID MORE!!!!!!

Well guess what? I did all that… ALL. OF. IT! I did all the things… ALL THE THINGS (and that’s part of the problem). I was following ALL the advice from out there that said if I just did all the perfect things then I would be successful. But after having kids, I never felt successful. I was constantly in conflict.

Friends, I’m going to stop right here and repeat myself. Feeling burnt out is not your fault. I get it… you’re trying so hard already! You’re wondering what’s wrong with you, why your life feels this way and how you can fix it.

I’m here to tell you it’s NOT ALL YOUR responsibility. I’m here to tell you that you’re not screwing ANYTHING up. I’m here to remind you that your sense of failure is the harsh consequence of living in a system that DOES NOT support women feeling successful.

YOU DESERVE to feel proud of yourself

YOU DESERVE to feel good about yourself

YOU DESERVE to feel successful

YOU DESERVE to love your body

I could go on and on… you DESERVE this! But you’ve been tricked, dear women, to believe otherwise! You’ve been tricked and sucked into the do-more, be-more culture. If this culture were WORKING, you’d feel a lot better.

Your pathway to feeling better is to start UNSUBSCRIBING from these imposed ideas.

These stories cannot survive in isolation.

I want to hold the invitation for you to join a group of women that are BRAVELY unsubscribing from that paradigm and stepping into a new one; one where they FEEL proud of themselves simply because they deserve to feel that way!

UGH, I cannot wait to shake these chains off with you!

What do you say?


With so much love and support,


PS: email me back ANYTIME. Let’s have the discussion, let’s share the stories… our hurt can only survive in the dark!

Jenny Shufelt has her Masters in Mental Health Counseling and is an Endorsed Mind Body Coach with over 15 years of direct coaching experience. Her mission is to build a deeper, kinder connection to herself and therefore the world around her. She assists working-moms who are so tired of doing more, in order to feel better; women who have internalized the idea that if they just tried harder, they wouldn’t feel the way they do. She supports their journey through individual coaching, group support and retreats. Jenny believes women deserve better than the “pop self-care culture” that perpetuates the do-more delusion!